I just started a new staging job with a new client, a really nice woman who found me in her internet search for a home stager. We met for the initial consultation, she gave me a tour of the house, and all was going well. With a staging plan in place, as I prepared to leave, my new client said to me with such relief in her voice, "You are so nice! I was afraid you would be mean!"
Mean?
As I stood there (I'm sure with my mouth hanging open), she went on to explain. She had seen the television shows with the not-so-nice stagers who criticize people's homes and unbeknownst to me, she was nervous about inviting me in.
So, I've been contemplating this.
I've always known home sellers might be a bit anxious to have a professional home stager come into their home, telling them what they need to change in order to make their home more appealing to buyers. I always try to reassure my clients-it's not about good or bad design. It is very possible for a house to be perfectly, beautifully designed and still not appeal to the widest array of buyers. Staging takes out the seller's personal taste and lets buyers imagine themselves living there.
So, a little nervous about inviting me in, yes, I expect that. But, afraid I would be mean? I felt terrible she had this impression of stagers. I also began to wonder how many sellers (and real estate agents too, for that matter) hesitate to hire a stager because of this fear?
Don't believe everything you see on TV! The reality is this:
A stager's job is not to be mean and criticize; a stager's job is to tell you the truth about your home and its appeal to homebuyers, and then formulate a plan to make your home show as well as it possibly can. We all have the same goal: for your home to sell as fast as possible for the most money possible.
A good home stager will work with you in a positive way to bring out the best in your home and should be able to do it without giving you nightmares!
I have to agree with you about the TV shows that shows the ogre stager. Not helpful.
My first thought upon seeing your title was that she had seen too many tv shows about staging. Glad you changed her opinion of the "mean home stager", it will probably get you lots of referral business as she happily spreads this news about you that "you aren't mean!".
Michele - what an interesting post! It's always good to listen, isn't it? You learn so much!! Now you know that this is the impression some people may have of your business you can go ahead and incorporate into all of your marketing touches that show you are indeed approachable and that it's a pleasure to work with you.
That's wild... I have only seen those shows a few times but I am sure it's not good PR for the staging industry or the staging process that these shows portay hysterical, snotty drama queens insulting the home owners.
Michelle, in retrospect it's a little humorous but I'm sure this was a little of shock at the time and an eye opener to you. Maybe you can use this experience to market yourself, add the story to your brochures, etc, to illustrate that TV is not real life! All the best!
Michele, I am fortunate to have a professional stager on my staff and she is the sweetest woman you could imagine. She staged my own home (that's how we met.) and gave me such great advice in a non-threatening, gentle way. So thanks to Shonnie, I have a great love and respect for stagers and just expect you all to be wonderful. GREAT POST!
Mean stagers, what's next, agents imitating Don Rickels? I don't watch reality TV shows. They are too surreal.
I am a Home Stager and a Realtor. Just the way I think but I would tread carefully around someone who would call you over and then tell you I thought you would be "mean." Perhaps they think they will get a better deal if they get you nervous about not being considered mean!
Make sure you get paid before you start staging! They also pay nothing for all that staging labor on TV. The TV shows are just that, they are not REAL. Don't get me started, but might make a great post. The Staging shown on TV is not like it is in REAL LIFE!
Thank you, Michele, and thank you, Marian -- we are a wonderful lot, most of us -- and struggle mightily to find a kind and tactful way to tell home-owners the bad news their realtor doesn't want to have to!! There are pretty funny ways of sugar-coating things. I have often promised to collect them into a manual. In time I'll get to it.... after I've scanned all the family photos and reprinted them in attractive, stackable compendiums, lost that niggling 50 pounds and written all the thank you notes I swore I would!! LOL
We need you at RESA meetings, Michele. We'll be coming down to some famous diner in Bordentown next. Are you anywhere near there?
Where do they find some of those people on TV anyway.. Maybe you can get a TV show and change the way homeowners thought of the home stager.. :)
Glad to hear it all worked out.
Hi Michele, I've seen one staging show in particular and it makes me cringe. Being respectful to the homeowner while delivering them the truth is an artform lost on many.
Hi Michele. I am glad the REAL you is not MEAN. People often have those preconceived notions don't they? Glad you turned them around.
Michele,
Ain't it the truth? I even use the term "sensitive stager" in my marketing materials, so realtors and clients know immediately that I'm not going to insult them.
There are so many ways to get rid of the nasty, nasty 80's sofa without using the words "nasty, nasty." :) Discussion of it's size, color, shape, whether or not it draws attention away from the architectural features of the home, how it relates to the neighborhood, the age and taste of the prospective buyer.
And Juliet, when you get together that list of sugar-coats, I'd love to read it!
Cheers,
Erin Appel
Erin Appel Interiors: Interior Redesign, Home Staging, & Home Organization
Minneapolis/St. Paul, MN
It's all about ratings. Nice people like yourself rarely make TV. People want train wrecks and hurt feelings. Thanks for being one of the nice ones!
True- I think the shock value keeps people coming back to watch those shows on staging, but it's true that many of those people seem really heartless on tv.
Thanks for sharing!
Michele, I don't watch much t.v so I never had the idea that home stagers could be mean but good for you for setting the record straight.
Great preconception to have them think before they meet you:) Glad TV is not so real!
Hi Michele,
This looks like you handled yourself with graciousness and honesty when you suggested what you like to do with their home and belongings. Sometimes sellers don't do what we want them to do and people get mad and the feel insulted. It is important to remember that they are inviting us into their homes and hiring us for a job or service that they need.
I work with an agent who prepares her clients before I arrive that it may be tough for them. I'm not exactly sure what she tells them, but they're usually relieved when it's over--they think it went much better than they expected! I think one of the best traits for a good home stager is diplomacy. You have to convince the homeowner to do what you're asking or their home won't sell as quickly as it could. Aggravating the client won't get them on your side!
Michele, great post. The Staging shows can be a blessing (making the public aware of Staging) and a curse ("but on television, the stagers painted all my walls and brought in new cabinets for nothing!"). You're right that it's a little scary inviting someone into your home to "critique" it but we certainly make every effort to be mindful of this and try to choose our words carefully. I try to spend some time letting them get to know me and letting them show me their house before I even begin.
Thanks for another good blog!
There was a blog post or a post of somekind somewhere recently.... It talked about the unreality of these real estate reality shows. Using houses that are not on the market, staging most of whats going on..... not much of it is real from what I saw in these posts...
Thanks to everyone for your kind words and comments!
Lenn- love the "ogre stager!" LOL!
Kim, Jackie, Silvia, and Erin-- Thanks and I think it will be something I incorporate into my marketing and the initial phone consultations. I never thought to do it but it seems there might be a need for it!
Juliet-- Would LOVE that compilation of "sugar-coatings." It could be like a stager dictionary! I'd love to come to the RESA meeting-- I think I saw you'll be at Mastori's? I'll be there just for the cheese bread! LOL! I'm about 20 minutes from there-- just let me know when! I'm also really looking forward to your "June Bloom!" Can't wait to see it!
Marian-- I love to hear positive feedback from agents!
Maureen, Joe, Beverly, Roland, Cynthia, and Ian-- I have to admit, I do watch the shows and get a kick out of them, especially when they can say the things I would never say! Being nice is obviously not good for ratings :-)) It's funny-- they always call the ones being nasty "real estate professionals" and the actual stagers are usually more tactful and sensitive. But-- it's stagers that get the bad rap!
Cathy, that is funny-- I would love to hear what that agents says to prepare her clients before your arrival!
Yeah - I can see where they would get that impression based on some of the shows...just like real estate agents are as bad as used car salesmen, who are as bad as lawyers, who are as bad as???? Well, you get my point - no profession can be ALL bad...there're gems and jerks in all of them!
Thanks Kathy! You hit a good point-- relationships are KEY. If our potential clients like us and trust that we want the best for them, they will be much more receptive to our ideas.
Kevin-- I would love to see what actually happens during the course of a staging show's production. I have often said I would love to have the resources they do-- the huge fully stocked warehouse, carpenters at my beck and call, movers, the best discounts I've ever seen, and a huge budget to work with!
Erika-- I think what surprised be about this was that with the concept of staging being relatively new, I didn't realize these perceptions were out there! Now I know-- and I can work around it :-)
Hello Michele, what a cute post! I usually get the opposite comment... (just kidding!) people think I am so sweet but I am mean in person! HAHA... But you are right, "A stager's job is not to be mean and criticize; a stager's job is to tell you the truth about your home and its appeal to homebuyers, and then formulate a plan to make your home show as well as it possibly can."
Great post, Michele. The popularity of the staging shows has definitely helped to educate the general public about the existence of staging, but the drama they show works well for tv but is far from reality. We stagers will just have to keep being the nice, tactful, helpful people we are and we will change this misperception one seller at a time.
Nice people are never as interesting or entertaining as stupid, vicious or nasty people. That's why good news is rarely published to advertised...Good job turning her impressions around. I bet it will result in referrals for you in the future!
Too funny Eileen!
Mary and Christianne: It's true-- OUR reality just wouldn't bring in those ratings! It's too bad though because stagers probably have some really good stories!
To be successful stagers have to have a discerning eye and a silver tongue or to put it more simply tact and taste.
Those shows are about ratings. They try to get the home seller excited about making "dramatic" changes. At the end of the day the approach isn't necessary. Best of luck in your future staging appointments!
Michele ~ this is the reality of what people view on TV. I too have been approached this way and had clients very intimidated upon me entering their homes because they thought also I was going to take everything out of the house and start over and it was going to cost them $1 million dollars (LOL!) to stage their homes.
You know, I hadn't thought about the "HGTV Effect" creating the "mean factor" in the minds of Sellers & Realtors (just the - "So you can do this in 30 minutes for under $1,000?" effect) Glad you put her mind at ease and showed her otherwise ;-)
Strange that people would draw an inference before meeting personally.
Patricia Aulson/Portsmouth NH Real Estate
A lot of people emotionally identify with their homes, and I think when (agents/stagers) offer constructive advice on placement etc, some will 'take it personally' no matter how diplomatically it's offered. Then they see on TV what is for dramatic effect and it 'programs' them to expect what probably won't happen . . .
Fortunately there are more of us in real than them on TV . . . :)
It tells me three things:
1. She finally felt comfortable at some piont to convey that to you once she saw you were there to make her comfortable as well as there to assist her, so of course you're not mean anyhow! LOL
2. Most of the time, I think people will say that towards another person (impose them as "mean") because they're naturally defensive and lost and upperhand of some kind
3. the people you see on reality television are not going to generate ratings for whatever show their on unless they're putting forth fireworks!! LOL
Susan-- you're right-- a discerning eye without the silver tongue can be brutal.
Thanks "Integrity!"
Kimberly-- it's funny the preconceptions people have about staging!
Connie-- I wasn't aware of it either until this happened. I'm really glad the woman said it-- how many have had these fears and kept quiet about it? Now, I know what's out there and can deal with it!
Patricia, Candice, and Shantee-- Now knowing she thought I'd be mean, I'm surprised she still took a chance and called me. I hope I offered her the "reality" of staging! It's nothing that would draw ratings but it will help sell her house LOL!
Michele - I would hope that most people would be able to differentiate between the exaggerated opinions of those stagers on TV from reality. For those of you out there that may not realize it - Reality TV is still not reality.
I can see how the tv shows would have made clients concerned about stagers being mean though I hadn't thought of it before.
Im so glad you wrote this blog, I hope it changes the way people feel about stagers.
Love your post! Guess we all need to work on our reputation some!As a result of this post I have decided that I am going to stop kicking my clients when they have messy closets! :-)
Troy: Maybe because people in general know so few stagers in real life? As we gain popularity, maybe they'll get it!
Christine: I hadn't thought about it either-- now we know!
Thanks Joanie-- I hope they realize we're not so scary!
LOL Karen-- no more kicking!